Thursday, September 29, 2022

How Not To Marry A Loser

 I wanted to write a long post originally, but then decided I'd just give you a couple of examples based on what I've seen irl, details somewhat changed, obviously.

Case 1.

A guy goes on vacation and picks up a divorced single mom who is cute and very easy. Somehow she gets pregnant and he takes her and the kid back home. He doesn't actually know much about her and her character besides that she's good in bed (or so he thinks). He later finds out that she is lazy, low class, entitled and has substance abuse problems.

Case 2. A good Christian girl keeps herself for marriage and doesn't date much. She meets a guy who is also a believer from a decent Christian middle class family and falls in love. The family wine and dine her and that makes her blind to the fact that the guy in question is a school dropout, can't hold a job and gets a burnout the moment he has to exert himself. After the wedding she finds out that he expects her to keep working even after the children come, prefers to work part-time himself but won't lift a finger to help with the housework.

Case 3. A Christian guy meets a Christian girl who is pretty, good-natured and a virgin. He marries her and then finds out that she has a princess complex, doesn't cook, doesn't clean but has a taste for luxury. 

Add to these an example of a guy who is an eternal student because he doesn't want to work and gets pain in his head/back from working a normal working week, a party girl who had like 100 men in her bed but is now "reformed" and wishes for a good Christian husband (but still likes to party), a guy who is 30 but expects his parents to take care of him and a girl who says she doesn't want children because her career is more important.

I could go on, but I think you get my point. If you wish to have a good marriage and a normal family life avoid these types like the plague. Let them marry each other...


  1. Hi, I’m Liz from USA, longtime lurker, but had to comment. You are so right, my daughter married loser #2. Now has a life of hell. Not only does he hate to work, he has proclaimed himself mentally ill. So I guess that’s the ‘Get out of jail free’ card to do whatever he wants. A loser is sniffing around daughter #2. I put my foot down hard this time. Keep these great posts coming!

  2. Hello Liz and welcome, I'm glad you liked this post! Unfortunately, a person can be a Christian and still an unsuitable marriage partner for some reason. And as Christians, we aren't allowed to divorce unless it's adultery, abandonment (and probably abuse), so it's very important to be vigilant before the wedding takes place.

    As for secular people, they very often just drift into marriage, with predictable results. It was probably easier in the past when the society was generally better than it is now.

  3. Also, so sorry about your daughter! I'm usually trying to write in general terms but I think it's important to try and warn young people.

    1. Interestingly enough, as you said, she renounced her Christian faith, married a man- child who renounced his as well. Secular wedding, did not take his last name, kept her Maiden name. Now suffers the aftermath. I can only say so much, but he has managed to alienate her and the children. Daughters and sons… please listen to your parents! We know from which we speak! Best, Liz

  4. Our whole culture is built around glorifying lust on the one hand and romantic love on the other. People put more thought into choosing a car than a marriage partner and father/mother of their future children. We are taught that "love is love" and all other considerations don't matter. By the same reason, it's OK to break your vows and divorce when you are "out of love". Honour, duty, none of it matters any more...