Wednesday, December 18, 2019

The Most Important Decision In Your Life

is, for any woman, choosing a man you are going to marry. You aren't just choosing a romantic partner, you are choosing the father of your children, and since children inherit 50% of their genes from the father, your future children as well.

If you are a Christian, the most important thing about your future husband should be whether he is a Christian himself. If you choose a fixer upper in the hopes of reforming him by the power of your "love" you are gambling and may be in for a very rude awakening. You are also disregarding the clear command in the Scriptures on not being unequally yoked and will probably reap the consequences.

(I actually believe that this command has a broader meaning and ideally, one should choose a spouse from a similar background.)

The second most important quality of your future husband is his ability to earn a living. I'm honestly quite alarmed at the amount of young women moving in with some guy who doesn't even want to marry them and working full time and overtime to support him and pay the rent. You AREN'T supposed as a woman to provide for an able-bodied man and even worse, one who isn't even your own husband. If a man doesn't have a stable income and some kind of a shelter he has no business to start a family. It's just that simple.

If you wish to marry young, then you should probably look up to men in their late twenties who are more or less financially established.

There is another factor to figure in. In a Christian family, the husband is the head and his wife is supposed to submit, but it will be much easier for you if you have similar ideas about things like child-raising, which church to go etc, so it makes a lot of sense to discuss these things beforehand. If you keep fighting all the time, will it make for a good relationship in the future?

We have all been taught by the MSM that marriage is all about "love" and "romance" and yet for the elites behind it, marriage is a hard business decision which has to do with furthering your blood line and your family wealth. I'm not saying that we should be equally mercenary in our actions, but it usually pays off to learn from those who are successful at something and not those who fail. The virtues of hard work, saving money instead of burning it up on frivolous entertainment, and being able to delay gratification, ultimately will pay off in the future.

Outside of the wealthy, most men in the times past and in many countries, also  the women would work and save before they could afford to marry. In fact, I was criticised for my last post but I've read statistics which showed that well before modern feminism, in the previous centuries the average marriage age for men in Northern Europe was about 30 and for women, 28. The reason for it was that since one income family was the norm, both had to save money in order to get married.

Marrying right out of high school was popularised by baby boomers, I believe, and is often pushed nowadays as the "return to the good old times" but the truth behind it is that this custom normalised married women working since many young men couldn't provide for the family alone at such a young age and required the wife to work, too, until they got established in their careers.

In countries like France, btw, where single women enjoyed less freedom, it wasn't uncommon to pair off a young girl of 18 with a man in his forties who could afford marriage. While I'm not against arranged marriages per se, I doubt it would work in our culture.

I know it's difficult for young people out there. It was bad in my time (late 1990s beginning 2000s) and it's even worse now, and many parents hardly even care to provide any guidance for the children any more and lack morals themselves. When you are young, you think you are invincible and the whole world lies at your feet and you can overcome every obstacle, and you are idealistic and romantic. I urge you to consider one thing: bad marriage is very difficult to overcome. It will ruin your life and that of your children. Don't just "drift" into it, plan it carefully and choose wisely. Pray for guidance and don't be deceived by pretty lies men are so fond of telling to silly young girls.

Pastor Anderson is the preacher many love to hate, and obviously, I don't agree with all he says but that video is really good: don't be worse than a concubine.


  1. I should probably just go ahead and mop the kitchen floor, but here I am typing. I am bewildered in these modern times that so many women either can't or refuse to see the predicament they put themselves in by giving themselves away to guys that are just users. I'm grieved for the women because #1, I don't believe for a second that they are truly happy. #2, those relationships are rarely lasting and #3, most importantly, it's wrong.

    " many parents hardly even care to provide any guidance for the children any more and lack morals themselves."

    I quite agree! In fact a minister that I often listen to said many times that delinquent parents are the real cause of problems in modern society.

    I think we are in the midst of a horrendous breakdown in society, and it has it's roots in the move away from traditional, Biblical family life.

  2. Magnolia, I'm afraid it's going to get worse before it gets better! I agree with you about women being used, what I find quite amazing though is that they sincerely believe it's emancipation...