Tuesday, May 27, 2014

VIctorians Had It Right!

Victorians have a bad reputation for being supposedly stuck-up hypocrites who would conceal their feelings because they were too dishonest to talk frankly about what bothered them. They did, however, have a point. I noticed that when you keep talking about unpleasant things, you start feeling worse instead of better.

How many times did we all hear that we should never suppress our emotions and that if we have problems, the best thing to do is to share them with others? It works in some situations, but dwelling too much on the negativity only creates more of it. In the times past, people were taught to minimise their problems, to talk lightly of them and to concentrate on the pleasant things in life.

If you feel upset about certain things it's better to avoid discussing them. It may be politics or religion or family troubles or health problems or anything which makes you feel uncomfortable. If reading newspapers or watching the news makes your blood pressure rise, quit doing it! Life is too short to be wasted on worrying about things you can't change.


  1. I agree! I know of a psychologist who would tell his patients to NOT talk about the past hurts. His daughter was a brief friend of mine, and she told me of this wisdom of her father.

  2. I also mentioned this in my current post.

  3. I wonder if they wrote more in their diaries on these things or were their minds trained to not dwell on upsetting things.

  4. Lydia, I'll check your post. I think they were trained not to dwell on the negative things, but to concentrate on something else instead. My all-times favourite female character is one out of the book by Alistaire McLean "South of Java Head". The events happen during WWII, but she is an old lady so must be a Victorian. Their ship was bombed by the Japanese and sunk, they are drifting amid the ocean in a small rescue boat with wounded and dying men all around, there is little food and even less water, and what is the lady doing? Is she panicky or hysterical? No, she is KNITTING!